Are you uncertain about what the conference is about? Read this article by a past attendee to find out!
Is the Conference Really Worthwhile?
by Marilyn Vrooman-Robertson
I expect that at some point, whether for first time attendees or those that have attended many times, a thought may cross our minds: “Is the cost of the weekend worth it”. It’s not only the financial cost, but the time away. Is it really worth it?
The first time we attended the BCC (Banff Couples Conference), the changes to our marriage were earth-shattering. From the outside likely no one noticed the change, but for the two of us our relationship was forever changed. We had learned to listen to each other. Even when the words brought discomfort, we listened. Oddly enough, once we did that, the discomfort subsided and in its place grew empathy and understanding.
Let’s move ahead seven years. We dedicate a couple hours per month to check-in with one another. We happen to do this with a group of friends we have met at the Banff Couples Conference. It helps to maintain the magic of the conference. There is a social element, but also some quiet time for each couple to speak privately. On one such evening, we learned the price of the Conference was definitely worth it.
Once each of the couples was seconded away in a private space in the house with their topic, the Man began to speak to me. At first it was his eyes that spoke. They implored me to listen as he had something very important to say and he might gather the courage only once to tell me. He quietly whispered to me a great fear that he carried with him daily. I was surprised and taken aback by his admission. However I knew it had taken great courage to be vulnerable and that he trusted me to hold this information. He no longer had to carry the burden alone. More importantly, I was aware of what actions fed his fear. As I listened to him and watched him as he spoke, my love for him deepened.
So is it worth it? A resounding yes would be our answer. There is little chance that we would have had that conversation if not for the skills we learned at BCC. We walk together on this path called life. Neither of us is perfect, but where one struggles, the other one supports.
So yes, like the previous six years, we will rearrange our work calendars, our social calendars and pack our bags. We’ll pack warm winter clothes, boots, swimsuits, dress clothes but most importantly we will bring each other. We will laugh and cry, meet new friends and greet old ones. The one thing we know for certain is that our lives are ever-evolving; there are always new topics to share with one another. Each year we will learn new communication skills or talk about things we haven’t yet discussed.
So come. Come and walk together with your best friend. Allow the beauty and peace of nature seep into your pores. Come and allow the hands of your loved one to warm your body. Come and gaze into the eyes of your loved one and fall in love all over again.
Marilyn Vrooman-Robertson is a dedicated BCC attendee and past BCC co-chair with her husband, Kevin Robertson